I HATE BOYS

Today is a day for loneliness. It feels like I've drank a gallon of tea, my inisdes are bursting and I want to vomit. Death. Maybe I'm starting my period? That would be a relief, I FUCKING HATE HATE HATE HATE boys. James was with some girl from his school. Unfortunately she was cute. I kind of wanted to gut her, she had on doc martens and a wore a black slip with lace in her hair. She was a fucking whore. I think her name was Megan, I need to get a voodoo doll and start torturing her. James was all over her. I think she was even older than him, like a freshman in college or something. What kind of freshman in college wants to date a senior in highschool? A fucking whore, that is who! I want to smash her in the fucking face.

So basically I hung out with Brandon the whole night in the living room. So lame, the bands were playing in the back yard. They had lots of beer and some whiskey and vodka too. Brandon and I just drank a few beers on the kids couch and "talked." I made him go outside for Jame's set. I made Brandon take me home half way through the set. He got really upset when I told him I wanted to go home, it was like like eleven but I couldn't stand being there anymore. I don't want to go to anymore of his parties. I feel crazy.

I need to listen to music really loud and jump around and break stuff. I've been listening to The Stooges first album and it's just making me feel crazier but I don't know what else to do.

Actually I think I know what to do. I'm going to listen to Beware by Misfits. It's new. Last Caress was my instant favorite. I'm also going to write James a letter that I'll probably end up burning. Till later.

I got something to say
I killed your baby today
And it doesnt matter much to me
As long as its dead

Well I got something to say
I raped your mother today
And it doesnt matter much to me
As long as she spread

Sweet lovely death
I am waiting for your breath
Come sweet death, one last caress

Go

Sweet lovely death
I am waiting for your breath
Come sweet death, one last caress

Well, I got something to say
I killed your baby today
And it doesnt matter much to me
As long as its dead

Sweet lovely death
I am waiting for your breath
Come sweet death
One last caress

One last caress, sweet death
One last caress, sweet death