I'm laying in bed listening to Another Green World and I don't want to do anything else. Today was completely lame, I am so tired of school and I am not even close to being done.
I should call Brandon but I don't think I can stand to talk to anyone right now.
I have class with Michael on Mondays. Michael is some ugly football kid who doesn't have a clue about anything beyond his BO. He disgusts me, but of course I have to sit next to him in my math class. God, I wish I was really good at math so I wouldn't have to sit in classes with disgusting people like Michael. Administration really needs to make classes for two types of people, smart but tragic types and smelly jocks. I hate smelly jocks. Anyway, he kept flicking his pencil at the sides of my arms and whispering DYKE in my ears. Like I am a fucking Dyke, God it's so lame to even think I'd be thought of like that. Does he want to kill me? He really scares me. Anyway, so I raised my hand to tell Mr. Schmidt that Michael was annoying me and it needed to stop and Mr. Schmidt was like "Can't you both see I'm trying to teach here, either stop now or you both can indulge me in detention and clean all the desks." What an asshole! Then, as if it wasn't worse, Michael leaned into my ear and was like "Dyke, what the fuck did you do that for?"
I kind of really love my hair but now I kind of really hate it. I don't know what to do. I wish I could be a song and not a human. If I was a song I'd play in some nightclub in London and everyone would dance to me and no one would make fun of me because only people with amazing hair would get to hear me.
Golden hours is my favorite song on Another Green World. Right now, if I could trade my life to be that song, I think I totally world. I should go commit suicide.
Golden Hours:
The passage of time is flicking dimly upon the screen;
I can't see the lines I used to think I could read between.
Perhaps my brains have turned to sand.
Oh me oh my, I think it's been an eternity.
You'd be surprised at my degree of uncertainty.
How can moments go so slow?
Several times I've seen the evening slide away.
Watching the signs taking over from the fading day.
Perhaps my brains are old and scrambled ...
Several times I've seen the evening slide away.
Watching the signs taking over from the fading day.
Changing water into wine...
Several times I've seen the evening slide away.
Watching the signs taking over from the fading day.
Putting grapes back on the vine...
[Sung simultaneously to last two verses]
Who could believe what a poor set of eyes can show you?
Who would believe what an innocent voice could do?
Never a silence, always a face at the door
Who would believe what a poor set of ears can tell you?
Who would believe what a weak pair of hands can do?
Never a silence, always a foot in the door.
Monday, January 21, 1980
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